What
do I know about trust?
Rebecca Carlisle
workshops
Play With
Your Words
Writing Workshop
Magic Money
in issue seven
Scintillations
Alice Springs
Putting Off Trust
She
What Do I Know
About Trust?
Growing Into My Own
Bits of Trust
Slowing Down
Death of a Season
Trust Me, I Was Told
Servicemen’s
Camaraderie
Moody Girl
On Faith
Letters To My
Younger Self
photography
Leaves
Anna Giabanidis
Lemon Chillin
Brian Mayden
Steering Wheel
Julie Russell
Cover Outtakes
Scott Carlisle
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Jumping into writing an article about trust when I know
nothing about it? That's
why I need to write it. Because
I need to discover more about trusting.
I think all of us need to learn more about trust.
What does it mean, anyway, to trust?
To open my heart and hope that it will remain safe
while in your presence. To
venture within your heart and hope you will feel safe in my
presence. To
listen to words from people's mouths and believe them.
To trust that the sun will come up tomorrow, my car
will start, my dreams will continue, money will appear,
there's not a lethal amount of hydrogenated fats in my potato
chips. It's
always a balancing act throughout the day.
Too much to think about.
I just want to let go and trust.
In those brave moments when I know faith is the only
thing that will get me through the day, it feels like there
are closed eyes and timid feet making a tiny step forward.
Breath held, eyes fluttering our foot falls onto solid
ground. A sigh.
Made it through again.
No matter how many miles we travel, we are still faced
with this dilemma each time.
Trusting uses the same muscles over and over again.
What do I want to trust?
Whom do I want to trust?
I want to trust that I am loved.
I want to trust that everything will be fine.
That I will surmount the enormous obstacles in front of
me. I want to
trust that my guardian angels are on their toes and watching
out for me. I
want to trust that people have my best intentions in their
minds. How do we
keep going without trust?
When we look into another's eyes, are we sure what we
see there? Do we
know if what someone is saying is the truth?
I don't like to have to ask these questions. I want to trust that what I hear you telling me is the truth.
After finding out the hard way many, many times that
there are liars out in the world, I still have to believe.
I would much rather be gullible than cynical.
I don't care. I
don't want to be a person that mistrusts everyone.
I am proud that I expect the best out of my fellow
human beings. Even
when there is no logical reason to expect it.
I think my discovery of the untrustworthy has helped me
on my quest to feeling secure that I can trust some people,
some things. Maybe
what I'm searching for is a way to trust myself.
A way to trust my own instincts.
Believing in those little tingly feelings that
translate to "head for the hills!" or "yes,
dear, this is right."
It seems like the process of trusting is an ongoing
one. The mind
keeps wondering…did I do the right thing? say the right
words? should I have stayed and not run? fled instead of
remaining stuck? am I judging others too harshly? am I judging
myself too harshly?
Our minds are tireless.
I will write many articles in my life.
Lots of them will be infused with trust.
Some day I hope to fully understand it.
Some day I hope to fully accept it.
Some day I hope to sleep peacefully, trusting
completely that I will wake up and fully enjoy the new day.
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