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Real Friendship
Letters To My Younger
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My Friends
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Grateful For That Kiss
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Making Friends
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Issue
One: Change
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Two: Balance
Issue Three: Spring
Issue Four: Goddess
Issue Five: Bravery
I have several friendships that have
managed to survive and thrive for a long time.
I don’t feel old enough to have had friends for over
20 years, but I do. These
are the most beautiful relationships in my life.
How can friendships survive all the time, changes,
heartbreaks, illnesses, disappointments, and distance?
How can we still find something to new to talk about
every time we happen to pick up the phone?
One of my oldest and dearest friends
lives hundreds of miles away from me.
We have kept our friendship alive by becoming
“Survivor Buddies”. She calls me every Friday to dish about the latest episode of
“Survivor”. I
know it’s her because she begins each call with “Survivors
ready?!” I
smile. I guess I
am more hooked on the phone calls than the show, but I don’t
care. We start
our conversations with the usual comments about Lex and Big
Tom, but end up telling each other all the important, tiny,
gory details of our own ordinary lives.
Almost always we end up saying we wished we lived
closer to one another.
I was lucky enough to be able to see this
dear friend several times over the holiday season because we
were staying nearby. We
even got to watch an episode of Survivor together at her
house. I think
that was the highlight of my trip.
Just being able to be there in person on a dumb old
Thursday night was wonderful.
We got to slouch on her sofa, drink 7-Up, shush each
other as the Survivor theme song began to play, make fun of
the commercials, laugh at the same time, and simultaneously
gasp at the parting comments the “loser of the week” made.
I also got to give my friend a real live hug and see
her smile, and watch her play with her hair as she talked.
I got to share a simple dinner that she made for me and
hold her newest baby in my arms.
I got to take a few breaths of the same air with her
and relax knowing that I would be able to see her again soon
while my vacation lasted.
Now I’m back home and far away from my
friend again. The
last few times she has called she asks jokingly, “When are
you coming over tonight?” and I smile bittersweetly.
I wish I lived close enough so I could
drop by and do stupid things with her more often.
Maybe just watch the rain fall from the same storm
cloud or stare at each other and laugh for no good reason. I
guess I want to be able to just have the chance to be myself
without having to do anything, and be in the presence of
somebody else doing the same thing.
We seem to be so busy all the time trying to get things
done. I want to
be able to do nothing for a little while.
I want to have the privilege of doing nothing in the
company of all of my beloved friends. I don’t want to have to create an acceptable excuse to see
them, or squeeze in a visit while I’m in the area for
another occasion, but show up just because I want to be a
friend. I plan to
make sure I spend some “nothing” time in person with all
of my friends in the next twenty years.
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