workshops
Play With
Your Words
Writing Workshop
Magic Money
in issue six
Scintillations
Real Friendship
Letters To My Younger
Self
My Friends
And Me
Real Dream Interpretation
More Real Dreams
Surviving Friendship
Grateful For That Kiss
Supportive Friend
Moody Girl
Making Friends
With My Inner Critic
Low Speed Chase
To Power
Periodic Friend
Life Based
Upon A Word
Follically-Challenged
Friendships
photography
Scott Carlisle
Dana Ehrlich
poetry
Poetry from
Play With Your Words
Write or
Photograph
For Be Real Magazine
take me back
To The Cover
To The Contents Page
in
every issue
What Do You Think?
Subscribe To Be Real
future
issues
Issue Seven: Trust
Issue
Eight: Power
previous
issues
Issue
One: Change
Issue
Two: Balance
Issue Three: Spring
Issue Four: Goddess
Issue Five: Bravery
by
Adrienne Medaris
............................................................................................
Tuesday:
Life is horrible. Horrible.
Horrible. HORRIBLE! Everything’s a mess.
Nothing is working.
My relationships are all in the toilet.
I look like hell.
This sucks! Why
is everyone so mean to me today?!
Are they all hurting my feelings on purpose?? Do I have a sign on my back that says “be as nasty and
cruel as possible”? Everything
is making me cry! I
just want to go to bed and not wake up ever ever ever ever
ever!!!!! Nobody
loves me and I can’t find any Kleenex to wipe my eyes.
Forget it. I
quit. I hate
today, I hate everything, I hate my car, I hate this stupid
itchy tag on the back of my shirt, I hate all traffic lights
– even the green ones.
My husband is wrong, wrong, wrong!
I can’t believe him!
I want a divorce! Screw him! Get
away from me you bastard!!!
I don’t want a kiss!
I don’t want anything!
NO!! *I*
will make dinner, just get the hell out of the kitchen!!….I
feel so lost and lonely… I don’t know what’s wrong with me. How am I going to
change my life and all the things wrong with it?
What am I going to do?
It’s hopeless. I’m
hopeless. Everything
is so screwed up and I am such a loser.
Owww! I burned my finger on the cookie sheet! Fuck tater tots!!!! Fuck
them, fuck them, fuck them!
I'm going to bed,
goddamn it and cry all by myself because nobody gives a
shit whether I live or die.
............................................................................................
Wednesday:
I feel like crap. My back is achy and I don't know why. I better not be getting a fucking cold again. Why is
my lower back is aching? My shoulders are aching too. I don't get it.
Oh shit! Why oh why didn't I pack tampons in my purse when I was thinking about it earlier?! Great...where's the nearest drug store?
Ohhhhhh.....THAT'S why I was crying yesterday! And this explains all the mean people yesterday.
I'll just tell them to go to hell until Saturday when they seem normal again.
Sorry, honey, it's just that time of the month.
............................................................................................
Be Real Magazine | P.O. Box 26606 | San Francisco, CA 94126
Copyright © 2000-2005 Be Real Magazine. All rights reserved.
